Those of you who read my “general conference predictions” are no doubt WELL AWARE that NONE of them happened. Sigh. My disappointment was such that I found myself going to bed early after the 3rd session, shedding some tears and sitting with my emotions for a while, allowing myself to sleep it off. Having distanced myself from my initial reactions, and having allowed my thoughts to form some structure, I would like to share WHY I still hold out hope for those specific changes to be made, as well as provide some insight into my personal spiritual journey that connects to this particular aspect of expanded ministry, why I advocate for an extended priesthood, as well as a less-restrictive worship style.
Yes, Women Should Offer Blessings---Why?
As a graduate student, I had the unique opportunity to study with a group of mostly protestant students, who were either non-denominational, Baptist, or associated to some sort of charismatic sect (7th day Adventists, Pentecostal, etc.). Needless to say, their worship style was far more vivacious than what I was accustomed to---allowing outpourings of the spirit to be recognized with uplifted hands, enthusiastic affirmations of “amen!”, quiet and gentle spontaneous whispered prayers, etc. When provided opportunities to worship together with my cohort, it took me awhile to relax enough to rid myself of my self-conscious conservative “Mormon” manner and allow my body to react simultaneously with the acclimations of praise the came from within my soul. Had I been recorded during these church services, no doubt I would still have most likely been the most conservative person in the room, body-language wise, but after my 3 years in that environment, I could comfortably raise my hands in praise, sway to the rhythm of a moving, contemporary worship song, and shout acclimations of praise when feeling so inspired. I learned that “reverence” does not necessarily mean “conservative silence,” as typical LDS worship so often depicts.
On one particular occasion, during a “Spiritual Formations” course (basically, a class that helped you get your spiritual/emotional life in order during your academic coursework), a classmate who was struggling in their personal life asked if the class would pray for them. The instructor, particularly in-tune with student’s needs as well as Christian psychology, reacted affirmingly and lovingly, encouraging the class to circle around this young woman and to “lay hands” upon her. I balked. I had NEVER done this before. Immediately, my mind raced with the LDS association of “laying on of hands” in association with Priesthood authority---any yet, the spirit drew me forward out of love and concern for this fellow classmate. My heart racing, I joined the class, though still somewhat timid. Encircling her, we stretched out our hands towards her, making a full connection between our bodies and hers (my hands were on the shoulders of my classmates whose hands were on this young woman’s head), while one student offered up a prayer to Heavenly Father that he would see her need and pour out blessings upon her. After this student ended his prayer, another student picked up, offering words of comfort and power, laced with scripture and sincerity, after which, another student followed in offering a blessing of comfort, reminding this woman of the promises God has made her. After this genuine and spontaneous act of blessing occurred, we all hugged, some with tears running down their faces, allowing the spirit within the room to engulf us all, for all had participated, and all were edified.
That same day, after blessing our classmate, we started class with a simple with a scripture, a short expounding on that scripture, followed by a worship song. The song was Kari Jobe’s “Revelation Song”---an incredibly powerful and simple song reminding the listener of the Holiness of Him who was and is and is to come---“Jesus, your name is power! Life and living water![1]”---when those words were sang, I felt as if floodgates in my heart had burst open, and tears began to run down my cheeks as I quietly wept there in the classroom. I wasn’t the only one feeling strong emotions--- some of my classmates had their hands raised up gently towards the sky, some were swaying with the music; the genuine physical response to this outpouring of the spirit witnessing of Christ’s divinity was felt by all. My classmate, seeing my emotional response, reached over and laid her hand on my shoulder, bowed her head, and began gently speaking “yes Lord, yes. We feel thy spirit and we are here because of you. Thank you Lord for pouring out your spirit on my sister. Thank you for her, Lord, and allowing her to be here. We praise you and acknowledge you in all things! In Jesus’ name…” The song ended, my friend squeezed my shoulder once gently and then returned to her seat.
“WHAT JUST HAPPENED?!” I thought to myself, panicked. For girl raised in a conservative LDS environment, this was all so wonderfully overwhelming to me. I was thrilled, and yet, confused. Had I laid hands on someone? Had someone laid hands on me, and prayed for me? And not just anyone, but a woman?
What I experienced in my graduate studies is but one small example of “charismata[2]” that many Christians openly experience within their worship. Sadly, many conservative worshipers scoff at such displays of sincere worship, having only experienced first or secondhand sensational and dramatized episodes made popular by media and word of mouth (“snake charming,” dramatic faith healing involving aggressive language, demon-exorcism, etc., outlandish physical contortions, and so forth), as opposed to tasteful, energetic responses to the spirit.
Having had these experiences, and recently having listened to the increasing rhetoric of LDS leaders from the pulpit on the nature of “priesthood power” vs “priesthood authority”---I have found myself consistently asking what is different between me as a woman praying in “faith” for my sick child to be well vs. my husband offering a “Priesthood” blessing of healing? It seems to me, knowing that God is no respecter of persons, that God wouldn’t favor one over the other. Why then, do we as a church, reserve the administration of formal blessings of comfort and healing only to those with Priesthood office, rather than simply one with Priesthood power, as we have been told that women of faith have?[3] One of the beauties of the protestant faiths is their ability to maintain, simultaneously, a “Priesthood of believers” ( 1st Peter 2:5-9) while also maintaining a kind of “Priesthood office,” for those ordained to certain ministerial positions. I feel that as a church, we as Later-day Saints could expound upon this principal in the future and see women acting in roles formerly reserved for those with “Priesthood office.”
Because the LDS church is unbending on its policy of blessings being administered only by those with an official Priesthood office, (which, ironically, conflicts with early LDS history in relation to women offering blessings of comfort and healing)[4], sadly, women are formally denied a chance to expand and develop their spiritual gifts, as inspired by the Holy Ghost, and lack the confidence to call down blessings from Heaven which is their right to do so. I see this in direct violation with Paul’s mandate that we not “quench the spirit” ( 1 Thessalonians 5:19). Further, because of the formal “Priesthood” association with the “laying on of hands,” the very natural comfort of touch, and by extension, laying one’s hands on the one you are praying for, is unofficially yet culturally forbidden, lest someone be charged with “imitating the Priesthood.”
As a mother, I find this particularly painful. Having had fevering children, what is more natural than to lay my hands on their feverish heads, and offer up a prayer to God that he comfort them and relieve them of their ailment? Is that not a blessing? I will admit, sadly, that I have restrained myself in the past, wondering if I was doing something “offensive” or “heretical” in light of my faith tradition’s customs and teachings. I no longer hesitate, nor dance with the nuances of “prayers of faith” vs. “blessings”---they are the same to me now. Do I administer to my children, by virtue of Priesthood power through my faith in Christ? I do. Is that doctrinal? Yes, according to our teachings, it is. So why, then, are women not formally extended this role? I say it is long time due! To further that concept, as a woman, I find it particularly painful that I cannot minister to my husband in this way, laying my hands upon him and offering up a blessing as inspired by the Spirit through virtue of my faith in Christ. Who better to minister to a man than his wife? Further, as a sister in the gospel, I find it painful that I cannot show my love for the sisters I minister to by offering them specific blessings of comfort (and healing), unique to their circumstance and as inspired by the spirit.
This expansion of course can be (and I hope one day will be) applied to our current policy of naming and blessing infants. A mother should be a part of that physical ritual. I advocate for that and long for the day when we see that change in our church. Additionally, I see no reason why our young women are not passing the sacrament. While at one time it took a Priesthood office to witness a baptism, a mere policy change eradicated that formality---why not then allow our young women to contribute in this act of ministry to the congregation? Again, I see it happening and advocate for it. What a wonderful opportunity to train our youth to work side by side in church service, through the very act of administering the sacred emblems of Christ’s atonement we hold to be holy?
Taking my Own Advice
Now, having read this, there might be those of you asking, “how can she say this and sustain our leaders?” It is my belief that seriously considering these things of a theological nature that affect our church community and form church policy IS a way of sustaining and supporting our leaders. It is our role and duty to be active in faithful, doctrinal, and historically sound discussions as members of the church so that our associated circles might be edified. I do these things as an academic, while also maintaining my identity as a “member of the church.” Ironically, before General Conference, I wrote about the need to “have charity” for the speakers, as well as for our own reactions to the speakers. I was, as has been made obvious, disappointed that the changes I assumed were coming did not happen. I was frustrated with the lack of gender-inclusive speech among the speakers (IF we claim we have a Heavenly Mother, can we PLEASE say “Heavenly Parents” and not just use the term “the Father”? If we truly believe, as Eliza R. Snow penned, that we’ve “a mother there[5],” can we not do better in being consistent in representing her in our theology?! Yes! I think we can!), as well as what I perceived as the nuanced and doublespeak style of language used in reference to the sisters and their roles within the gospel plan.
That said, I have tried to apply my own advice and offer charity to those speakers who did not resonate with me, or whom I perhaps thought could have worded things differently. What I can say is that undoubtedly, I felt a sincere witness of Christ given throughout the conference, and that buoyed my soul. I heard His grace testified of and elaborated on, I heard preaching that expounded on a more Christlike path, a more spirit-filled ministry---and my soul was fed. Additionally, in my pre-conference blog post, I had also pointed out that this is a GLOBAL church. Things that perhaps seem timely to me as a saint here on the Wasatch Front may not be so to my brother or sister in Samoa, or Zimbabwe, or Indonesia. Therefore, after allowing myself to sit with my emotions for a good while, I took a big dose of humility and reminded myself of what I DO know for myself, that God has asked me to stay within this marvelous and messy organization, that I have a testimony of the Book of Mormon and of God’s latter-day work to heal and gather their children (notice the gender inclusive language, wink wink), and that Christ is at the helm. This is HIS work. Things are done “line upon line,” “here a little, there a little,” and in the meantime we hold out hope for the things which burn in our hearts. This I believe, and this I will do.
In conclusion, I have ended this General Conference season reflecting on a tradition that our Jewish brothers and sisters have. At the Passover seder (meal), after completing the Haggadah (the story of the Exodus, as well as the symbolic songs, blessings, and partaking of symbolic foods), those gathered around the table say, “next year in Jerusalem!” ---a reflection of their hope of good things to come. So it is with me, that I express my authentic reaction to the inspired leaders of this church, the hunger within my soul for change and inclusion, and the hope that I carry with me that each year we come one step closer to becoming a Zion people---“next year in Jerusalem!”
[1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3dZMBrGGmeE [2] A spiritual gift or charism (in Greek singular: χάρισμα charism, plural: χαρίσματα charismata) is an endowment or extraordinary power given by the Holy Spirit. These are the supernatural graces which individual Christians use (and were used in the days of the Apostles) to fulfill the mission of the church. “Charismata” is a term for the extraordinary graces given to individual Christians for the good of others (such as the laying on of hands, blessings of comfort and healing, prophecying, etc.) and is an extension of the fruits of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5). [3] https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/2019/03/connecting-daughters-of-god-with-his-priesthood-power?lang=eng [4] [One] aspect of Joseph Smith’s teachings to the Relief Society that may be unfamiliar today is his endorsement of women’s participation in giving blessings of healing. “Respecting the female laying on hands,” the Nauvoo Relief Society minutes record, Joseph said that “it is no sin for any body to do it that has faith,” and admonished, “if the sisters should have faith to heal the sick, let all hold their tongues, and let every thing roll on.”30 Some women had performed such blessings since the early days of the Church. At that time, Latter-day Saints understood the gift of healing primarily in terms of the New Testament’s teaching that it was one of the gifts of the Spirit available to believers through faith. Joseph Smith taught that the gift of healing was a sign that would follow “all that believe whether male or female.”31 During the 19th century, women frequently blessed the sick by the prayer of faith, and many women received priesthood blessings promising that they would have the gift of healing.32 “I have seen many demonstrations of the power and blessing of God through the administration of the sisters,” testified Elizabeth Ann Smith Whitney, who was, by her own account, blessed by Joseph Smith to exercise this gift.33 In reference to these healing blessings, Relief Society general president Eliza R. Snow explained in 1883, “Women can administer in the name of JESUS, but not by virtue of the Priesthood.” (https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/gospel-topics-essays/joseph-smiths-teachings-about-priesthood-temple-and-women?lang=eng)
I see why you must have felt disappointed. Let me offer a couple of thoughts in relation to your fitting statement that we are a global community. For me this kind of change has much to do with personal preparation and cultural relativism. Women of the Church, but then I feel uncomfortable using this labeling expression, I'd rather say women of God all over the world, still have to learn practicing how to drop so much ideological baggage, centuries, millennia of it. Still too many of us struggle to get out of boxes in which we feel we have been put in. Thing is, many still have to wake up to the reality that the box as imposed does not…
Kajsa,
Thanks for your eloquent and moving comments. I think that there is good evidence that women gave blessings in the past (as Stapley points out in The Mysteries of Godliness), and I see no reason that they shouldn't be allowed to now. I also think women should be as encouraged to go on missions as men, allowed to go at 18, and for two years. These are easy solutions to easy problems, though the hard problem still remains.